My reason for being here

At the beginning of this year, Alia, my second child, decided to go back to Montreal (Quebec – Canada) after a long depressive episode to achieve her program of study at the university. Her, Christophe my husband and I felt the need to be together during this fragile period after two years of uncertainty, deception, isolation and questioning. This has been my reason for being in Canada, for 5 weeks inFebruary/March 2022, the coldest time of the year, supporting her with our love and sharing precious time. Alia has been my sunshine in this cold freezing month, as her becoming herself through her transgender identity, and her intense personality are such enriching gifts. Today, I’m Alia’s ally and this has been a strong shift in my life. The path towards understanding and acceptance of her trans identity has been complex but I’m confident that I’m now at the right place along her side. The way we act together at present is key for her future as a fulfilled person and for our future as a family. Montreal and the whole Quebec province at that precise time were still under many restrictions due to the pandemic and the atmosphere, while sometimes beautiful, was also full of loneliness and emptiness.

As a photographer, I aimed to capture this very personal experience first to illustrate the emotions that my awareness of Alia’s new identity generated and, how Alia’s attitude, presence, smile and specificity warmed my heart and spirit while the temperature, the landscape, the streets were freezing my body.

The selected pictures of this Serie were taken “along the road” of our month together, genuinely, as a reaction of what I was seeing and living. I didn’t keep a distance with the subject, as I used to do in my work as if this shift in my life also created a shift in my photography.

Alia has been the reason; this essay is the result and sharing it is my pride.