The Sound Of The Sun

In The Sound Of The Sun, I tend the wounds of the complex relationship between myself, my younger sister, and my mother as a result of my mother's struggle with her mental health.

The work follows the timeline of our last time together before a manic relapse, the subsequent loss of contact for two years, and our reunion in 2021. It is woven together with found family images, my mother’s writing, and images from a road trip that the three of us took in May 2019 weeks before her relapse and the last time I saw her.

A few months after we had lost contact, I visited home to find a box that she had sent with some seemingly random books, notebooks, and family photos that were addressed to my sister and I. Some words of hers are the scans included in the work. I don’t know who they are addressed to, but I know they were meant for me. The family pictures + her writing are tiny pieces of evidence to show me what she was thinking, and who she was then. When culling images from our road trip with these, I find them filled with omens- the expanse of the west seems to tell me what is to come. This project is named after cicadas, whose noises I thought were the sounds the sun made on hot summer days when I was young. The day the three of us met again in Chicago, we collected their shells.

This work has helped me work through the loss experienced in the past few years and helped me to rekindle a new relationship with my mother. It continues to give me hope that I can have that love and trust with her again. My sister and I did not see her until 2021 when the newest images here were made. This work is ongoing as we rebuild our relationships.