Si No Vuelvo

Ursula Bahillo could still be alive. She had filed several charges against her ex-boyfriend, a police officer. But no protective measures were taken. He stabbed her to death on February 8, 2021. After Ursula's murder, protesters took to the streets throughout Argentina to denounce the heinous crime and the fatal failure of the authorities.

Ursula's murder is no exception. Since 2015 women in Argentina have been shouting "Ni una menos" ("not one more"), spurring a movement throughout Latin America and beyond.

But, the number of femicides is not decreasing: In 2020, a woman was killed every 29 hours in Argentina, with 212 children losing their mothers. “It is indeed another pandemic to attack,” states Florencia Raes in a 2020 United Nations report. A quarter of the murdered women had previously filed charges against their killers. 12% of the murderers were members of the security forces, according to the Observatorio MuMaLa. Another NGO even assumes in 1 out of 5 cases that the murderer belonged to the security forces. Where to you turn to when those who are supposed to protect us turn into lethal threats themselves?

Femicides have widespread effects. Children become orphans, families are destroyed, often threatened by the assassin through the years, justice is slow, and the hole that the person left can never be filled.

Si no vuelvo, rompan todo! - If I don't come back, destroy everything, was, what Ursula wrote on Twitter, a few days before her violent death. But according to her mother, Patricia, she didn't mean smashed windows or burning cars - she was talking about the structures, about a justice system that doesn't act quickly enough to save the lives of women, about police officers who protect and cover each other and about machismo, that is killing women not only in Argentina but every day, everywhere on a daily base. 

© Sarah Pabst - Image from the Si No Vuelvo photography project
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Sun sets on the road to Rojas, Province of Buenos Aires, Argentina, on April 19, 2021, where 18 year old Ursula Bahillo was stabbed brutally to death by her ex- boyfriend, 25 year old police officer Matías Martinez. Although she had filed several charges against him, no protective measurements were taken. The photo is intervened with a whatsapp text Ursula sent to one of her friends: I always kept silent. Until I saw myself dead. That's when I reported him.

© Sarah Pabst - Image from the Si No Vuelvo photography project
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Patricia Nasutti, Ursula’s mother, sits for a portrait wearing a T-Shirt with her daughter’s counterfeit in her living room in Rojas, Province of Buenos Aires, Argentina, on April 9, 2021. On the wall are huge signs she takes to manifestations. 18 year old Ursula Bahillo was stabbed to death by her ex-boyfriend, 25year old police officer Matias Martinez. She had been their only child. After her daughter's assassination, Patricia couldn't eat anymore and has lost 38kgs.

© Sarah Pabst - Image from the Si No Vuelvo photography project
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Oscar Zabala closes his eyes after lighting a candle on a small altar in memory of his daughter Barbara in the sleeping room of his mother’s house in 9. de Julio, Province of Buenos Aires, Argentina on April 20, 2021. Barbara Zabala was stabbed to death in Pehuajó by Brian David Dirassar, her ex-boyfriend, on the 6th of December 2019, the day of her 20th birthday, while she was walking down a street with two friends. Dirassar was also a member of the bonaerense, the police force of the Province of Buenos Aires, which at the same time is the biggest police force of Argentina. Zabala, a member of the police force himself being a specialist in disarming explosives, doesn’t want to live anymore in his house in Pehuajó, it holds too many memories for him.

© Sarah Pabst - Image from the Si No Vuelvo photography project
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Female activists of the Ni Una Menos movement take the streets in Buenos Aires, Argentina, on Feburary 17, 2021, shortly after Ursula Bahillo was murdered, demanding justice and changes in the institutional systems.

© Sarah Pabst - Image from the Si No Vuelvo photography project
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Patricia Nasutti, Ursula’s mother, set up a memorial altar for her daughter, containing jewelry, photos and accessories of her favorite soccer club, River Juniors, in Rojas, Province of Buenos Aires, Argentina, on April 9, 2021. A sign says: don’t touch. 18 year old Ursula Bahillo was stabbed to death by her ex-boyfriend, 25year old police officer Matias Martinez.

© Sarah Pabst - Image from the Si No Vuelvo photography project
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A mud road leads to the place close to a river in Rojas, Province of Buenos Aires, where police officer Martinez murdered his ex- girlfriend Ursula Bahillo, in Rojas, Province of Buenos Aires, Argentina, on April 10, 2021. 18 year old Ursula Bahillo was stabbed to death by her ex-boyfriend, 25 year old police officer Matias Martinez.

© Sarah Pabst - Image from the Si No Vuelvo photography project
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New director of the Police Office for Women in Rojas, Silvina Troncoso, stands in her office, on April 8, 2021, in Rojas, Province of Buenos Aires, Argentina. After Ursula‘s death, the office was heavily critiqued for not having helped her. Part of the staff was replaced and Troncoso became the new chief officer as a specialist for gender issues.

© Sarah Pabst - Image from the Si No Vuelvo photography project
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Ursula Bahillo’s motorbike stands unused and covered with a blanket in the entrance of the home of the Bahillo family in Rojas, Province of Buenos Aires, Argentina, on April 9, 2021. Her dog has been waiting for her return ever since. 18 year old

© Sarah Pabst - Image from the Si No Vuelvo photography project
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An intervened archive photo shows Oscar Zabala hugging his daughter Barbie. Barbara Zabala was stabbed to death in Pehuajó by Brian David Dirassar, her ex-boyfriend, on the 6th of December 2019, the day of her 20th birthday, while she was walking down a street with two friends. The hole that remains after a violent death can never be filled.

© Sarah Pabst - Image from the Si No Vuelvo photography project
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Thousands of case files on gender violence pile up at the prosecutors office in Morón, Province of Buenos Aires, Argentina, on April 23, 2021. The justice system is extremely slow as it lacks employees and technology.

© Sarah Pabst - Image from the Si No Vuelvo photography project
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Patricia Nasutti, mother of Ursula Bahillo, smokes a cigarette in the backyard of her house, wearing all her daughter’s jewelry, in the city of Rojas, Province of Buenos Aires, Argentina, on April 30, 2021. Ursula always asked her to smoke outside and honoring her daughter she continues to do so.

© Sarah Pabst - Image from the Si No Vuelvo photography project
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Gustavo Melmann sits on a bench on Plaza Tribunales, facing the court in Buenos Aires with a sign of his daughter Natalia in Buenos Aires, Argentina, on April 16, 2021. Natalia Melmann was kidnapped, raped and murdered by five police officers in the costal town of Miramar in 2001, at the age of 15. 20 years later, only 4 of the 5 have been convicted, two got their penalties reduced, one of them is already free again, only one, Mazo, got convicted for 18 years. Her father keeps fighting for justice so that he can finally find peace.

© Sarah Pabst - Image from the Si No Vuelvo photography project
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Oscar Zabala holds his daughters blood stained shirt that she wore on the day of her death, in his sleeping room of his mother’s house in 9. de Julio, Province of Buenos Aires, Argentina, on April 20, 2021. He had never opened the box before that contained the evidence of the day of her murder but felt the need to show it this particular day.

© Sarah Pabst - Image from the Si No Vuelvo photography project
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Patricia Nasutti, Ursula’s mother, shows a tattoo on her arm with her daughter’s name, in Rojas, Province of Buenos Aires, Argentina, on April 9, 2021.

© Sarah Pabst - Image from the Si No Vuelvo photography project
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The wall of the municipality is covered in graffitis saying „you chose the police“ and „mafiosos“ as well as leaflets demanding justice and accusing Martinez as assassin, in Rojas, Province of Buenos Aires, Argentina, on April 10, 2021. A month later, the city‘s governor had walls cleaned and set up surveillance to prevent further paintings and leaflets.

© Sarah Pabst - Image from the Si No Vuelvo photography project
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Police officers of the Bonaerense Police force, the biggest of Argentina with around 90000 officers, undergoes a gender training in Navarro, Province of Buenos Aires, Argentina, on April 19, 2021. Nestor Garcia, father of murdered Micaela Garcia, developed and fought for a law project called law Micaela, to have people in public services trained in gender issues.

© Sarah Pabst - Image from the Si No Vuelvo photography project
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Adriana Rodriguez and her half-sister Sofia Ibarra, 9 months pregnant, stand for a portrait in the garden of Adriana‘s house on April 9, in Marcos Paz, Province of Buenos Aires, Argentina. They are awaiting the trial of Hugo Ibarra, father of Sofia, who shot their mother Beba to death in front of a saloon where they were holding a party for the 15th birthday of Adriana‘s daughter.

© Sarah Pabst - Image from the Si No Vuelvo photography project
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Patricia Nasutti and her husband Adolfo Bahillo sit in their kitchen drinking mate in their home in the city of Rojas, Province of Buenos Aires, Argentina, on April 30, 2021. Ursula had been their only child, that arrived after 10years of treatments and longing. 18 year old Ursula Bahillo was stabbed to death by her ex-boyfriend, 25year old police officer Matias Martinez.

© Sarah Pabst - Image from the Si No Vuelvo photography project
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Signs asks for Justice for Ursula next to an image and shrine of the Difunta Correa, a legendary figure in folk-religion at the entrance of the city of Rojas, Province of Buenos Aires, Argentina, on April 29, 2021.

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