Oh Me, Oh Mãe

  • Dates
    2020 - 2021
  • Author
  • Location United Kingdom, United Kingdom

I began Oh Me, Oh Mãe after giving birth to my daughter, B, in June 2020. Mãe is Portuguese for mother (B is British-Portuguese).

As I had made a project about my pregnancy, I wanted to document early motherhood whilst being as honest as possible about my experiences. The images are accompanied by diaristic text (generally in the form of hashtags). The work is also a diary of becoming a mother during the Covid-19 pandemic.

I chose not to show B's full face within my work as she has no idea about the rest of the world and the internet at the moment. She may never want her face to be seen, so I want to wait until she is old enough to decide if she wants her face to be visible or not.

There are a few sub-series within the project with my favourite being 'Imitating B ___' that I have mainly selected to submit. This grew out of not showing her face.

The series came to a natural end when I discovered I was pregnant again in May 2021, and started work on a new project about being pregnant while being a mother to B.

© Jocelyn Allen - Image from the Oh Me, Oh Mãe photography project
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Breastfeeding, Bottle Feeding, Whatever Feeding (26th June 2020)   #ItHasBeenOver2WeeksSinceIGaveBirthToBAt37WeeksAnd5Days #ILearnedHowToExpressAndBottleFeedInTheHospital #ThoughInHospitalIUsedAMachineThatINicknamedTheBeast #ItWasMassiveAndYouCouldExpressColostrumWithIt #AnywaysILikeExpressingAsItMakesMeFeelLessStressed #WithBreastfeedingSometimesItJustGoesOnAndOnAndMyNipplesGetSuperSore #ThoughIAmTryingToBreastfeedHerABitMoreAsSometimesIForgetThatIDoNotHaveToRunToTheFridge #OrWeCanStartThatWayWhilstTiagoRunsToTheFridge #OrICanBreastfeedUntilIGetFedUpOrWantToSleepThenTiagoCanContinueWithTheBottle #ThisMorningSheWokeUpAt6SoIDecidedToBreastfeedHerInTheOtherRoomToLetTiagoSleep #WeAlsoHaveAChangingStationSetUpInTheBedroomAndOneInTheLivingRoomToSaveHassle #AnywaysIHaveABreastPumpThatAFriendGaveMe #IWasNotSureIfIWouldExpressButAfterUsingOneInHospitalIWasGladToComeHomeToIt #IfIHadNotBeenInHospitalForSoLongThenIWouldNotHaveBeenConfidentWithBottlefeeding #WeHaveTeatsThatAreForBreastfeedingBabies #SoInsteadOfTheMilkJustGushingFromTheBottleTheyHaveToWorkForItLikeTheyDoFromTheBoob #IAmNotSureWhetherToSayBoobOrBreastButBoobSoundsMoreCasualAndILikeCasual #ThenOnTheOtherBoobIHaveASiliconeManualBreastPump #ItSuctionsOnAndOnceMilkStartsFlowingFromTheOneBoobItWillAlsoStartFromTheOther #IAlsoUseItWhenBreastfeedingAsItDoesTheSameJob #ItIsJustABitDifficultToPutItOnIfSheIsLyingAcrossMeSoIUsuallyRugbyBallHoldHer #BreastfeedingCanBeALotMessierIfIDoNotUseItAsOftenSheWillBeSoakedFromALeakyBoobEvenIfIHavePadsIn #ThePumpAttachesToClothesSoItIsGreatForAttachingToMyPantsAsItIsSoHotAtTheMoment #OfCourseTheBatteryRanOutForTheFirstTimeInTheMiddleOfTheShootSoIHadToPlugItIn #PeopleCallingToCheckOnUsAreALittleJudgementalAboutHowIWantToFeedHer #AfterMyHospitalExperienceICanSeeWhyPeopleGiveUpWithBreastfeedingOrNeverStart #IAmLuckyAsICameHomeConfidentWithBreastfeedingExpressingAndBottleFeedingButSomePeopleDoNotGetAllThatHelp #AndWithThePandemicThereIsLessFaceToFaceHelp #AlsoWhenYourMilkIsFlowingYouCanBleedSoIBoughtSomeReusablePadsWhichWillComeInHandyWhenIHaveToFaceMyPeriodAgain #AWeirdSideEffectOfBreastfeedingAndHavingABabyIsThatIAmMoreAmbidextrousNowAsMyLeftHandAndArmAreGettingStronger

© Jocelyn Allen - Image from the Oh Me, Oh Mãe photography project
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I Am Worried That Someone Will Say I Am Holding Her Wrong (11th August 2020)   #IWasAwareThatIHadNotTakenAPictureInSomeDays #ISeemToDoMoreShootsTowardsTheEndOfTheWeek #ButIThinkIAmPutOffTakingPicturesWhilstITryToCatchUpWithPostingThemOnMyBlogWhichIsBad #BWasAsleepInHerPushchairBassinetAndIKnewIHadToFeedHerSoon #SoISetMyStudioStuffUpReadyAndTookAFewTestShotsWithoutHer #IFeltComfortableUsingTheLightsAsIKnewSheWouldBeFacingMe #IThoughtIWouldWriteTheHashtagsBeforeSheWokeUpButSheWokeUpSoonerThanIThought #IDidTheShootAndThenIStartedToPutStuffAwayWhilstFeedingHer #ThenShePutHerHandOnMyChestSoIPutEverythingBackAndDidSomeMorePhotos #IAmWorriedThatSomeoneWillSayIAmHoldingHerWrong #IWasSweatingTheWholeTimeAsItIsSoHotToday #PlannedToGoOutForLunchWithBToACoffeeShop #IEndedUpGoingTwoHoursLaterThanPlannedButItWasNice #ASignSaidToWearMasksIfYouAreNotSittingDownButIWasTheOnlyPersonWearingAMaskAroundTheCounter #ThisMorningWeWentToTheHospitalAsBHadToGetHerFeetLookedAt #SheWasBornWithPositionalTalipesWhichIThinkIsMoreWidelyKnownAsClubfoot #IHaveFinallyStoppedPronouncingTalipesLikeItIsPortuguese #TalipesIsACommonProblemApparently #BWokeMeUpAt5ThenWeBothWentBackToSleepAndMyAlarmDidNotGoOff #IWokeUpAndWasStressedOutAndTurnedToTToTellHimToGetUpButHeWasInTheBathroom #WeHadHalfAnHourToGetUpAndOut #SomehowWeManagedItButWeWereStressedAsWeHadNeverBeenToThatHospitalBefore #IEndedUpOnlyBeingACoupleOfMinutesLateAsInsteadOfAskingForDirectionsRightAwayITriedToFindTheDepartmentMyself #TheLetterWasAddressedToBabyAllenWhichTiagoSaidWasRudeButThatWasWhatSheWasCalledWhenSheWasBornAsMySurnameIsAllenAndIGaveBirthToHer #ISatDownForAMinuteAfterGivingHerFullNameAtReceptionThenWeGotCalledThrough #WeGotThroughTheQuestionsQuickThenAWomanCheckedHerFeetAndWithinAFewMinutesWeWereDone #SheThenSpentAgesJustTalkingToBBeforeWeWentToFindTiagoToGoHome #ThingsAreDefinitelyGoingBetterWithBreastfeedingThoughYesterdayWeWentToDinnerAndBottleFedHer #TheLastTwoMealsSheHadBeenAsleepTheWholeTimeWhereasThisTimeSheWasAwakeButItWasNiceToBuildOurConfidenceWithBeingOutWhilstSheIsAwake #IJustFeltMoreRelaxedBottlefeedingAndWeCouldShareItButIDoWantToTryToBreastfeedMoreInPublic

© Jocelyn Allen - Image from the Oh Me, Oh Mãe photography project
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They Say That It Takes A Village To Raise A Child, But We’re Cut Off From The Village (7th October 2020)   #TiagoSaysThatWeDoNotHaveAVillage #IPointedOutThatWeDoButItIsJustNotALocalVillageAsNoOneFromOurFamilyLivesCloseToUs #BsSleepHasGottenWorse #SheWasWakingUpAtNightBeforeButSheDidNotNeedToBeFedAndCouldBeSettled #NowSheWakesUpWithAHarshCryAndWillOnlySettleIfIFeedHer #IThinkSheFeedsMoreForComfortThanBecauseSheIsHungryThough #SheHadInjectionsAndThatNightSheSleptStraightThrough #WhichWasOddAsSheDoesUsuallyWakeUp #IHaveHadToFeedHerTwiceTheLastCoupleOfNights #WeWereGettingAnnoyedLastNight #IPutHerOnOurBedToGetReadyToFeedHer #ThenSheStartedToSmileAndBeAllCuteSoWeInstantlyFeltBad #IWasReadingThatYouShouldNotWatchTVAndBeOnYourPhoneWhilstYouFeed #IHaveBeenFeelingDownAgainSinceTiagoWentBackToWork #AndTheFilmsHaveBeenHighlightsDuringLongFeeds #AsIUsuallyFeedHerFor40Minutes #ThereIsOnlySoMuchThatICanTalkToHerWhilstSheHasHerMouthFull #YesIDoFeelGuilty #MyLifeIsPrettyMuchTheSameEveryday #IThinkThisPandemicIsMakingMeMoreSociallyAwkwardThanIAlreadyWas #TheIdeaOfGroupChatsJustMakesMeFeelAnxious #ICanNotImagineBeingInARoomFullOfPeopleAtAnEventAnymore #ItIsSoWeird #WeTookBSwimmingTheOtherDay #SheSeemedToLikeItThoughWeWereOnlyInTheWaterFor20Minutes #ItWasNiceToDoSomethingDifferentAsAFamily #TheWeatherHasTurnedAndTheOtherDayIDidNotGoOutForAWalkThenYesterdayIGotRainedOn #INeedToJustFocusOnTakingLifeOneDayAtATime #AndTryToFindMorePositivityInThisWeirdTimeAsOtherwiseItIsGoingToBeAVeryLongWinter #IReallyEnjoyedThisShootWithBSoMaybeINeedToCollaborateWithHerMore

© Jocelyn Allen - Image from the Oh Me, Oh Mãe photography project
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Imitating B Trying To Eat Her Toes (24th November 2020)   #ThisShootWasMeJustImitatingBWhenSheDoesTheHappyBabyYogaPoseAndWhenSheTriesToPutHerToesInHerMouth #ICanSeeHowThePoseGotTheNameNow #SheHasBeenDoingThisForAWhileButMyPlanOfCopyingHerHasBeenNeglectedForAWhile #YesterdayITookHerOutForTwoWalksDuringHerAwakeTimes #HerWakeWindowsAreUsuallyBetweenTwoAndTwoAndAHalfHoursNow #ThatIsALongTimeToEntertainHer4TimesADay #SoItMakesSenseToTakeHerOutDuringHerPlaytimesRatherThanNaptimes #IPutHerForwardFacingInHerCarrierForTheFirstTime #SheIsOldEnoughNowAndIFiguredItMightBeBetterForLettingHerSeeThings #FirstITookHerOutInTheMorningAndALotOfPeopleSaidGoodMorningToUsWhichWasReallyNice #SheJustSeemedToCheerSomePeopleUpAndWeStoppedToTalkToAYoungGirlAndHerFamilyWhoHadPointedAtHer #IWalkedForABitTooLongAndBFellAsleep #NextITookHerOutInTheAfternoonButWeDidNotMakeItSoFar #ThereWereALotOfSchoolKidsAroundWhichFreaksMeOutALittleBitSoNextTimeWeNeedToBeEarlier #IHadPutSomeLittleBootsOnHerFeet #ButAfterGettingHomeTheSecondTimeICouldNotFindOneOfThem #IWaitedForTiagoToFinishAWorkCallSoHeCouldWatchB #ThenIRetracedOurStepsAndFoundItNotSoFarAwayOnAPath #SoINeedToBeCarefulAboutTheAmountOfTimeAndKeepAnEyeOnHerBoots #TheWeatherWasReallyNiceYesterdayButPuttingHerInTheCarrierMightNotBeAGreatPlanForEveryday #SheHasBeenWakingUpALotAtNightLatelyWhichIsMakingTAndIABitGrumpy #LastWeekSheWasStillBreastfeedingTwoOrThreeTimesADay #ButNowSheReallyDoesNotWantToBreastfeedWhichIsABitOfAShame #IThinkItProbablyHasALotToDoWithHerTeething #ThoughSometimesIAmTryingToGetHerToLatchOnAndSheJustTipsHerHeadBackAndLooksLonginglyAtAnEmptyBottleThatIForgotToMove #MyMumSaysThatSheWantedToBreastfeedMySistersAndIForLongerButWeStoppedBeingInterestedAround4Months #TodayIMightJustTryFormulaFeedingHerForEveryFeedAndSeeIfThatHelpsWithHerSleep #IAlsoMightGiveHerSomeBabyRiceTodayButIFeelLikeISayThatEveryday #IAmCurrentlySpendingALotOfMyFreeTimePlanningForAHashtagWorkshop #IAmNervousAboutItButIHopeThatItGoesWellAndThatPeopleEnjoyIt

© Jocelyn Allen - Image from the Oh Me, Oh Mãe photography project
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I Carried Her Coat Down The Stairs On My Head And Thought It Was Interesting Enough For A Photo (1st December 2020)   #IAmInSuchABadMoodThisMorning #BSleptForAbout7HoursStraightLastNightButItIsNeverEnough #IHaveBeenPreparingSomeButternutSquashForHerToday #AndAttemptedToMakeAButternutSquashAndCarrotSoupForUs #YesterdayTheHealthVisitorCameAndSheSaidBIsProgressingWell #SheIsStayingWithinHerWeightPercentileWhichIsGood #ISaidThatIAmStrugglingABitMentally #InLiverpoolIToldMyGPWhoSaidToTellMyHealthVisitor #HereInBirminghamTheHealthVisitorSaysIShouldTellMyGPAndGaveMeANumberForAPostNatalServiceToTry #IFeltQuiteGoodYesterdaySoIThoughtIWouldCallThemWhenIFeltBad #IMightGiveThemACallLater #TheHealthVisitorIsComingAtTheEndOfThisMonthToCheckOnMeAgain #SheKeptSayingThatIFeltLonelyButIDoNotReallyIJustWantMoreVariationInBsPlaytimes #IHaveFinallyManagedToSignBUpForAClass #ThereAreSomeClassesBeforeXmasAndThenThereIsABigGapThenAnotherFew #IAmExcitedButAlsoVeryNervous #OurScheduleIsVeryFocusedAroundHomeSoIFeelABitStressedAboutHavingToPlanAroundAClass #ItWillBeGoodForUsThoughAndIHopeToFindOthersToGoTo #IWasHopingThatTheHealthVisitorWouldGiveMeAListOfPlacesThatICouldGoTo #TheChildrensCentreIsQuiteFarToWalkToButApparentlyTheyHaveOnlineClassesAtTheMoment #IHaveNotHadToPackABagForBForAges #AndIHaveNotFedHerInPublicForALongTime #IGuessIShouldTakeABottleOfFormulaJustInCase #TheOtherDayISaidSheHadNotBreastfedInAWhileAndThatIHadGivenUp #IInspiredMyselfToTryAgain #IDoNotThinkSheIsGettingMuchButSheIsGettingSomething #IWasQuiteSurprisedThatMyMilkHadNotCompletelyDriedUp #MyWorkshopWentWellThoughALotMorePeopleSignedUpThanAttended #IWorkedHardOnItSoInTheEveningITreatedMyselfToABathWithSomeBathSaltsThatIBought5MonthsAgoButHadNotUsedYet #ThereWasNotMuchHotWaterSoInTheEndIJustSoakedMyselfInAPrettyColdBath

© Jocelyn Allen - Image from the Oh Me, Oh Mãe photography project
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Imitating B’s One Red Cheek (19th December 2020)   #BHasBeenTeethingSinceBeforeWeMoved #SheStillDoesNotHaveAToothToShowForItAllButMaybeOneIsNearlyHere #SheUsuallyHasTwoRedCheeksWhenItIsAtItsWorst #ButTheOtherDaySheHadJustOneForTheFirstTime #IUsuallyGiveHerSomeTeethingPowderDuringTheDay #IWouldNotHaveThoughtItWouldWorkButAFriendRecommendedIt #AndThenAtNightIfItSeemsBadIWillGiveHerParacetamol #SheWokeUpALotLastNightSoIProbablyShouldHaveGivenHerSomeMore #IWishSheCouldCommunicateAndLetUsKnowIfSheIsInALotOfPain #IJustDoNotWantToGiveHerTooMuchParacetamolUnnecessarily #MyPlanToGetUpAt7ishHasNotBeenGoingSoWellTheLastCoupleOfDays #TypicallyWeAlwaysSeemToGetUpLateOnDaysWhereWeNeedToBeOutOfTheHouseInTheMorning #YesterdayIReadAnArticleAboutMotherhoodAndArtistsAt2amAndCouldNotSleepAgainUntil5am #MyBrainWouldNotStopThinkingAboutIt #IFeelLikeIShouldNotBeMakingSoMuchWorkAboutMotherhood #ButItIsAHugeNewPartOfMyLifeAndSoItSeemsLikeAnObviousThingToDo #EspeciallyWhenMyWorkIsALotAboutProcessingMyThoughtsAndFeelingsMostOfTheTime #IHaveBeenFeelingFineMentallyStill #ThoughOnDaysWhereItRainsAllDayIDoFeelALittleStuckIndoors #YesterdayWeManagedToWalkToAClassAndAvoidTheRainOnTheWayThere #EveryoneHadTheirBabiesInChristmasOutfits #IManagedToPutBInSomethingOtherThanAOnesieButSheLookedLikeSheWasDressedForEaster #AtLeastIHadRedAndGreenSocksOnButTheyWereWatermelonRelated #IAmNotTooFussedAboutChristmas #BWillNotRealiseWhatIsGoingOn #IHaveAlreadyGivenHerHerChristmasPresentAsIDidNotSeeThePointOfWaiting #SheLikesTheMonkeyPuppetThatTheTeacherInYesterdaysClassUses #WeWereWaitingForTiagoToPickUsUpAndIMentionedThatIWantedToGetBOne #TheTeacherSellsThemSoIGotHerOneAndGaveItHerInTheCar #OpeningAndClosingItsMouthIsAGoodHandStrengtheningWorkout

© Jocelyn Allen - Image from the Oh Me, Oh Mãe photography project
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I Have Started To Balance Things On My Head For B’s Amusement (30th December 2020)   #ItIs9InTheMorningAndBIsHavingANap #WeMadeAnEffortToStartTheDayAt7TodayThoughYesterdayItWasMoreLike5 #IFeelLikeBJustHadAReallyFunHourAndIWishICouldBeThatHighEnergyAllDayWithHer #LotsOfSingingSongsAndLiftingHerIntoTheAirAndReadingBooksEtc #TheOtherDayIHadARagingHeadacheAndStillManagedToPretendToBeAHorseWhileSingingTheWilliamTellOverture #WeBounceHerUpAndDownWhileWeSingItButWeGetExtraGigglesIfOneOfUsIsAHorseToo #IAlsoLoveHowILookForwardToHavingMeTimeButThenISpendSomeOfItLookingAtPicturesAndVideosOfHer #SheHasBeenABitGrumpyTheLastFewDaysBecauseOfTeething #WeWentToMyParentsHouseTheOtherDayForTheFirstTimeInMonths #WeAreAllowedToBeInASupportBubbleWithThemAsBIsUnder1 #BWasCryingAsSheDidNotRecogniseMyDadAndWasEvenBeingFunnyWithMyMumEvenThoughSheSeesHerAFewTimesAWeek #IHopeTheTeethingStopsForABitSoonAsIFeelBadForB #INeedToStopMakingHerNewFoodAndUseWhatWeHaveInTheFreezer #ISuddenlyRealisedYesterdayThatSoonSheWillBe7MonthsAndCanStartEatingOtherThings #AndWeHaveAFreezerFullOfHomemadeBabyFoodAndNoSpareTubsForNewStuff #IThinkIAmGivingHerTooMuchPorridgeInTheMorningAsSheDoesNotLikeToEatMuchForLunch #ButSheGenerallyAlwaysEatsHerPorridgeSoIUsuallyMakeABatchWhichIsEnoughFor3Days #YesterdayIMadeSomeCourgetteSpringOnionRiceWithCheese #SheDidNotSeemImpressedByItButIEnjoyedEatingSome #TodaySheMightEatItAllSoYouNeverKnowThoughIWillTryGivingItToHerForDinnerRatherThanLunch #InOtherNewsIHaveCompletedMyKegelsApp #WellItIsNotCompletedAsKegelsAreForLifeNotJustUntilYouReachTheHardestLevel #TheyAreSoTimeConsumingNowAndIProbablyDoNotDoThemThatWellButIGuessSomeIsBetterThanNone #INeedToGoOnATrampolineAndSeeHowEffectiveTheyReallyAre #IAlsoNeedToStopTalkingSoMuchRubbishToPeople #IJustGetVerbalDiarrhoeaAndAfterwardsICringeAtAllOfTheThingsThatIHaveSaid #IHaveSaidItBeforeButIThinkThisPandemicHasImpactedMySocialSkills #ObviouslyWorseThingsHaveHappenedToALotOfPeopleButItIsAWeirdSideEffect #ThoughReallyIThinkMySocialSkillsHaveAlwaysBeenBadAndIAmJustMoreAwareOfThingsAtTheMoment #ItHasSnowedTheLastCoupleOfDaysAndBSeemsALittleIntriguedByItButObviouslyICanNotFindOutWhatSheReallyThinksAboutItAll  

© Jocelyn Allen - Image from the Oh Me, Oh Mãe photography project
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Imitating B With Her Hands And Feet On The Floor (6th March 2021)   #BIsDefinitelyMovingAroundQuickerEachDay #YesterdaySheGotStuckByTheCushionsByTheTVAsSheOnlyLikesRollingOneWaySoSheKeptRollingIntoThemRatherThanAwayFromThem #ThisPhotoIsMeImitatingHerWithHerHandsAndFeetOnTheFloorWhichSheHasStartedToDoInTheLastWeekOrSo #ICanNotImagineHerWalkingAroundButIGuessThoseDaysAreGettingCloserAndCloser #SometimesAtNightNowIHearHerCryingSoITurnOnTheMonitorAndSheIsJustSatUpInHerCot #IHadACallWithMySupportBefrienderPersonTheOtherDay #SheSaidSheThatCouldTellThatIWasDown #ISaidIDoNotKnowWhyIBotherMakingProjectsAndThingsWithTheFreeTimeIHaveWhenICouldBeRelaxingInstead #SheSaidItIsBecauseYouLoveIt #ILikeThisProjectFromTimeToTimeButItIsMoreThatIFeelIHaveToMakeIt #WhenIDoAGoodShootIFeelGreatButWhenIDoNotIFeelPrettyDown #SoHerCommentGaveMeAKickToActuallyStartShootingForAProjectThatIHaveBeenThinkingAboutForAFewWeeks #IDoNotKnowIfItWillEverSeeTheLightOfDayButIDefinitelyFeelBetterForHavingStartedIt #ThisMorningTiagoGotBUpAt7AndHeWillLookAfterHerUntilHerNapAtAround10 #IDidMyDanceVideosFirstThingToGetThemDoneAsIFeelLikeTheyHangOverMeAtTheWeekend #TodayIReallyEnjoyedItButSomeWeeksItIsJustAnotherThingThatIFeelIHaveToDo #INeedToStopFeelingGuiltyForHavingSomeTimeToMyself #IWorkPrettyQuicklyNowWithTheFreeTimeIHaveAndTiagoIsBsDadSoOfCourseHeShouldBeSpendingTimeWithHer #IThinkIFeelBadAsTiagoIsWorkingAllWeekAndMakingMoneyWhereasIDoNotMakeMuch #IAmDoingSomeNonArtPaidWorkAtTheMomentWhichIJustDoInFifteenMinutesToTwoHoursIshSessions #IDoLookForOtherWorkWhereBWouldHaveToGoToNurseryButThereDoesNotSeemToBeMuchOutThere #ItWouldAlsoNeedToBeSomethingWhichLeavesMeWithEnoughAfterPayingNurseryFeesToSeemWorthIt #MostOfTheMumsIKnowWithBabiesOfASimilarAgeAreEitherBackAtWorkOrGoingBackSoon #ItIsAnnoyingInTheSenseThatSoonWeWillBeAbleToHangOutWithOtherBabiesButTheyAllMightBeInNurseries #IGuessThereWillBeSomeAroundThoughWhoseParentsWorkPartTimeOrWhoAreInASimilarPosition #IHaveSpokenToACoupleOfMumsThisWeekAtThePlaygroundWeGoTo #IRealiseNowThatEveryoneElseProbablyWantsToChatButTheyAreJustAsAwkwardAsMe #MyCurrentMumPickupLineIsHowOldIsYourLittleOne #WeSayWeWillSeeEachOtherAroundButWeHaveLivedHereForFourMonthsAndIDoNotThinkIHaveSeenThemBefore #WorkingOnANewProjectAndTalkingToPeopleMakesMeFeelHappierSoINeedToKeepOnDoingWhatIAmDoing

© Jocelyn Allen - Image from the Oh Me, Oh Mãe photography project
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Imitating B Inspecting Dirt On The Floor (21st March 2021)   #NothingGetsPastBTheseDays #EspeciallyAnyBitOfDirtOnTheFloorThatSheIsQuickToPickUp #SheIsSoFastAndWeBreatheASighOfReliefWhenSheSitsStillForAMinute #ThisWeekHasBeenMyBusiestWeekSinceSheWasBornIThink #AndOfCourseItCoincidedWithBsFirstToothStartingToCutThroughHerGums #ItIsDay6AndIDoNotThinkItHasBrokenTheSurfaceYet #AWomanAtTheParkSaidItCanTakeUpToAMonthForAToothToFullyAppear #WeHaveStartedToBrushBsTeethOrRatherGumsToGetHerUsedToUsDoingIt #HerToothpasteIsFor0To2YearOldsButItSaysTheyShouldSpitItOut #BHasBeenLaughingAtMeShowingHerHowToSpitItOutButIDoNotThinkItMattersThatMuch #HerNapsHaveGenerallyBeenALotShorterAndSheUsuallyWakesUpAt6amNow #IHaveBeenWorkingUntil11ishQuiteALotButThenItTakesSoLongForMyBrainToSwitchOff #WeManagedOneEpisodeOfAShowForDateNightLastNightThenWeWentToBedAt10 #IAmDreadingTheClocksChangingNextWeekendThoughIAmLookingForwardToLighterEvenings #YesterdayIHadPortfolioReviewsAndWorkWorkToDoSoTiagoLookedAfterBForMostOfTheDay #IWasReadingSomethingAboutTheSuccessOfAFemaleArtistAfterHavingKidsSeemsToCorrelateToHowSupportiveTheirPartnerIs #IFeelLuckyThatTiagoIsSupportiveOfItAllAsOtherwiseItWouldBeHarderToGetThingsDone #ForTheNextMonthOrSoIWillBeOutALotMoreWorkingWhichMeansLessTimeForMyOwnStuffSoWeWillSeeHowThatAllGoes #AKidAtTheParkTheOtherDayCameOverAndStartedToPushBInTheSwing #SheDidNotKnowWhatToMakeOfItAndIWasAlsoABitUnsureOfWhatToDo #IDoNowKnowHowToTalkToKids #TheOtherDayICriedAsIHadQuiteATenderMomentWithB #SheWasInspectingMyFingersWithGreatCareAndWasLaughingAtMeRaisingMyEyebrowsUpAndDown #SheAlsoHasANewCheekyGrinWhichIsSuperAdorable #SheLikesToPlayWithTheBalloonsThatWeBlewUpForOneOfHerBabyClasses #SheIsYetToUnderstandThatTheyCanPopAndIAmNotLookingForwardToTheDayThatTheyDo #RecentlySheWasReallyDiggingHerFingersIntoItAndIHatedTheNoise #IQuicklyPutMyHandsOverMyEarsAndSheAlsoFoundThatHilarious #INeedToDoSomeResearchIntoWhatSoundsAllAnimalsMake #ForExampleWhatSoundDoesAGiraffeMake

© Jocelyn Allen - Image from the Oh Me, Oh Mãe photography project
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Imitating B Standing Up In Her Cot (17th April 2021)   #ThisSeemsToBeANewSkillThatBHasDevelopedInTheLastFewDays #ThisMorningTiagoWentToGetHerAndSaidThatSheWasStandingUpInIt #AtTimesSheGripsSoTightToTheFrameThatHerHandsLoseTheirColour #IAmSoRelievedThatItIsTheWeekend #TheWeekdaysJustSeemToDragSoMuchAndByThursdayIAmUsuallyNotFeelingSoGreat #IWasGladWeGoToGoToAClassThisWeekButThenIJustFeltRubbishAfterwards #ItWasSoNiceToSitInARoomWithPeopleAndBabiesAndToInteract #SoEverydaySinceHasJustFeltCrummyAsIWantTheSameExperienceEveryWeekday #NextWeekWeHaveAFewMoreThingsInOurDiarySoHopefullyItWillBeNicer #SomeDaysITakeBOutTwiceADayJustToTryToHaveSomeKindOfInteractionWithSomeone #ItSoundsDumbAsObviouslyWeLiveWithMyNanAndTiagoButSometimesTiagoIsOutOrIDoNotWantToBotherHim #AlsoAFewMinutesIsNotTheSameAsHangingOutWithSomeoneForAPeriodOfTime #IFeelBadAsIFeelLonelyWhenISpendAllDayWithB #SheIsGoodCompanyButItIsTheNotTheSameAsHavingConversationsWithPeople #IWorrySheWillReadThisWhenSheIsOlderAndFeelBad #BILoveYouButThisPandemicHasBeenToughAndThingsAreNotHowIThoughtTheyWouldBe #IFeelLikePeopleCanSmellTheDesperationOnMeAndAgainMySocialSkillsAreRubbish #ICanNotBeTheOnlyOneInTheAreaThatFeelsLikeThisThough #IWouldSignBUpForAClassEverydayButALotClashWithBsNaps #ICouldTryToRearrangeHerDayButItFeelsLikeABitTooMuch #EspeciallyAsIDoLikeTheScheduleWeHaveAndIAmUsedToIt #SoIProbablyShouldNotWhineThenButIAmABitStuckInMyWays #AtSomePointSheWillGoDownToOneNapADayAndThenThatWillChangeTheDayALot #ThoughForNowINeedHerToHaveHerTwoNapsSoICanGetThingsDone #YesterdayIWasSoTiredThatIJustGotIntoBedAndReadAndNappedDuringThem #MyBodyGetsToAPointWhereItIsSoTiredThatIJustNeedToRestAndRecover #IThinkTheTirednessIsOftenCausedByMyMentalStateButIfThereIsNothingPressingToDoThenARestIsFine #AnywaysINeedToStopWhiningAndTryToBeProactiveToMakeTheWeekdaysBetter #IStillDreadMealtimesABitThoughSheIsEatingWellTheseDays #HopefullyWithBetterWeatherOnTheWayWeCanJustSitOutsideMoreAndThatWillBeEnoughOfAChangeToMakeTheDaysPassBetter  

© Jocelyn Allen - Image from the Oh Me, Oh Mãe photography project
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Imitating B Chewing On A Wet Flannel (28th April 2021)   #IAmSurprisedThatIsHasTakenMeThisLongToGetRoundToImitatingBChewingOnAWetFlannel #AfterAMealIUsuallyWetAFlannelATryToWashHerFace #HoweverSheJustWantsToChewOnItAsIGuessItMustFeelNiceForHerEverTeethingGums #IBetWhenSheIsOlderBWillCallMeOutChoosingNotToShowHerFullFaceButDecidingToShareThingsLikeThis #FairPlayFutureB #SheHasStartedToSayGaGaMoreNow #YesterdayWeGotSentAQuestionnaireToFillInAboutHerDevelopment #AHealthVisitorWouldUsuallyVisitHerAround9To12MonthsToDoItButBecauseOfCovidTheyAreNotDoingItFaceToFace #ThereAreQuestionsAboutCommunicationGrossMotorSkillsFineMotorSkillsProblemSolvingPersonalSkillsAndSocialSkills #IThinkBNowDoesMostOfTheThingsThatItTalksAboutButIAmWorriedAboutFillingItInWrong #ItIsShameThatSomeoneCanNotJustComeRoundAndDoItButIDoNotHaveAnyConcernsAboutHer #LastWeekIWasWorriedThatSheWasTooHotInTheNightAndNowIThinkSheHasBeenTooCold #SheWasAwakeForAnHourAndAHalfTheOtherNightButWentBackToSleepAfterIPutHerHeaterOn #ItWasEitherThatThatFixedItOrItWasACoincidence #IGotABitEmotionalYesterdaySeeingBHavingFunWithBabiesHerOwnAge #WeHadAPicnicWithAMotherAndBabyFromOneOfHerClassesAndItWasReallyNice #ThenSheWasJustCrawlingAroundAndInteractingWithBabiesInHerClass #ThisIsHowItShouldHaveBeenTheWholeTimeSheHasBeenAliveButOhWell #TheTeacherSaidThatTheyLearnTheConceptOfSharingAtFourWhichWeAllSighedAt #ButReadingOnlineAnArticleSaysTheyReallyWantThingsToBeFairByTheTimeTheyAreSevenOrEight #SoPlentyMoreYearsOfApologisingForBGrabbingToysAwayFromOtherKidsGreat #MyAuntCameRoundToVisitUsAndBWasNotHappyAboutIt #ThoughAgainAfterAWhileSheWasFineInHerCompanySoItIsGoodToKnowItIsJustAboutPerseverance #IWasFeelingABitDownTheOtherDayAgainAndThenIRealisedThatTiagoHasNotHadAWeekOffSinceTheStartOfOctober #NoWonderWeAreAllTired #HeHasFinallyBookedAWeekOffInAMonthOrSoSoItIsNiceToHaveSomethingToCountDownTo #INeedToWorkToBeMorePresentWhenIAmWithB #ICompletedASurveyAboutSocialMediaTheOtherDayAndItAskedMeAboutMyMoodsWhenUsingIt #IWasReallyNegativeAboutAllOfItSoINeedToUseItAndMyPhoneALotLess #IWantToBeABetterMotherToBAndIWantToFeelHappier

© Jocelyn Allen - Image from the Oh Me, Oh Mãe photography project
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Hire Us For Your Denim Advert (6th May 2021)   #ThisWeekIsMaternalMentalHealthAwarenessWeek #ItFeelsSomewhatFittingAsIWasSupposedToDoAllThisYesterdayButIFeltTooCrapTo #IHadANapWhenBHadHerFirstNapAndIFeltMuchBetterButTheRestOfTheDayWasStillASlog #ThisProjectIsSupposedToBeAllAboutHonestyAndStuffButIFeelLikeIDoLeaveQuiteABitOut #IThinkFromReadingMyProjectThoughItIsSomewhatClearThatIHaveBeenStruggling #ItGoesUpAndDownAndSometimesIFeelFineAndThenIJustReallyRubbishAgain #IHaveBeenFindingItHardToGetOutOfBedEvenIfISleepFairlyWell #IThinkIHaveDippedAgainBecauseTheWeatherHasBeenSoCrummyAgainLately #ItJustRainsEveryDayAndIFeelStuckInsideButMoreThingsReopenIn11DaysSoIHopeThatWillMakeABigDifference #IFeelLikeICanNotCompletelyRelaxInTheLivingRoomAtMyNansHouseWhichIsMoreToDoWithMeThanHer #AgainWithTheWeatherBeingRubbishItMeansOurOptionsAreLimitedWithWhereWeCanGo #AsBHasBlackoutBlindsTapedToHerWindowIDoNotLikeToTakeHerInThereMuchAsItIsSoDark #SoThisMorningIBroughtHerToOurBedroomWhichIHadToChildproofABitMoreForHer #IWasWorriedThatSheWasColdAndIDidNotWantToGoDownstairsToGetHerUsualIndoorJacket #SoIPutHerInHerDenimJacketThatSheHadNotWornBeforeAndIHadBroughtUpstairsAnHourBefore #ThenIRememberedThatTiagoHasADenimJacketSoIThoughtIWouldWearItAndWeCouldDoAShootToPassTheTimeUntilBreakfast #IAmNotSureWhichPictureIWillChooseYetButBWasQuiteFedUpAndIWasFeelingDownSoIfItLooksAllHappyFamilyThenThatMightNotBeTheReality #HireUsForYourDenimAdvert #MyMumIsHereNowSoIThinkWeWillGoHomeWithHerJustToGetAChangeOfScenery #BWasIllAndShePassedItOntoMeAndNowAllMyTeethHurtWhichIHopeIsJustRelatedToFeelingRundown #ItIsPainfulAndParacetamolDoesNotSeemToTouchItWhichDoesNotMakeMeFeelMuchBetter #BeingIllWhenYouDoNotHaveAKidIsTotallyDifferentToBeingIllWithAKid #LuckilyItWasABankHolidayWeekendSoTiagoWasAroundToHelpForAnExtraDayButICouldHaveJustDoneWithLyingInBedForAFewDaysButSillyMeFeelsGuiltyAboutSuchThingsNow #YesterdayWeDidAVideoCallInTheKitchenAndIPutBsWalkerThereToSeeIfSheWouldUseIt #BeforeIHadEvenStartedTheCallSheStoodUpAndStartedToPushItWhichWasAHugeSurprise #ITriedToGetHerToShowTiagoLaterButIThinkSheWasABitTiredAndDidNotDoItSoWell #SomeGoodNewsIsHeHadAnInterviewForHisBritishPassportAndThatWasFineSoFingersCrossedThatWillBeSortedSoon #WeAreDefinitelyInNeedOfSomeTimeAwaySomewhereAndWeHopeWeCanSeeHisFamilyThisSummer #IDoWonderHowIWouldHaveBeenIfIHadHadABabyInNonCovidTimesButIGuessIWouldStillBeStrugglingInSomeWay #IAmJustPissedOffThatItHasBeenATotalPostcodeLotteryWithWhatHasBeenOpenInDifferentAreasOverTheLastFewMonthsAndWithWhatSupportYouGet

© Jocelyn Allen - Image from the Oh Me, Oh Mãe photography project
i

Imitating B Sucking Her Thumb (9th May 2021)   #WellMaybeSheIsSuckingHerThumbOrMaybeSheIsJustTeething #TheTeethingSeemsLikeItWillNeverEndAndSheStillOnlyHasOneTooth #IHaveJustNoticedHerSuckingHerThumbAndFlappingHerHandAroundInTheLastWeek #SheHasBeenWakingUpBefore6LatelySoWeNeedToSeeWhatWeCanDoToPushHerWakeupTimeBack #IJustSeemSuperTiredAtTheMomentAndMyTeethAreStillHurtingALot #IbruprofenSeemsToTakeTheEdgeOffOfItButIThinkOneOfMyTeethNeedsToComeOut #TiagoSaidIfIGetItOutThenEventuallyTheNextOneWillNeedToComeOutAndSoOnAndHowWillIEatWithNoTeeth #IPointedOutThatBHasBeenDoingPrettyWellWithHerGumsForALongTime #ItRainedAllDayYesterdayButIDidNotCareSoMuchAsItIsTheWeekend #WeStillWentOutForAWalkAnywaysAndItWasQuiteNice #PortugalIsCurrentlyOnTheGreenTravelListSoWeAreLookingAtBookingATrip #ICanNotBelieveThatBIsNearlyAYearOldAndSheHasNotMetHerPortugueseGrandparentsYet #WeJustHaveToHopeThatThingsDoNotGetWorseAndThatWeWillNotHaveToQuarantineInAHotel #TheTripIsFaffyEnoughAsItIsLetAloneWithTravellingWithABabyWithCovidRestrictions #ItIsAMinimumOfTwoFlightsToGetToHisHomeIslandSoItIsLookingForTripsThatDoNotHaveMegaLayovers #MostOfTheFlightsAreEitherSuperEarlyInTheMorningOrTheyArriveBackLateAtNight #WhichWouldNotBeSoBadIfTheyWereFromBirminghamButWeWillHaveToTravelToManchesterOrLondon #AndItProbablyWillBeLondonAsTheyHaveFlightsThatLeaveAndArriveAtOkayishTimes #IAmAlreadyFeelingStressedAboutHavingToGetToAndFromTheAirports #PlusSortingOutTestingAndDealingWithDifferentAirlinesAndLuggage #IShouldNotComplainAsIKnowWeAreLuckyToBeAbleToGoAway #IfItWasNotForSeeingHisFamilyAndGoingToAWeddingAndHavingToSortOutThingsThereWeWouldJustLeaveItThough #OrIGuessWeWouldHaveMaybeTriedALocationThatWasALotEasierToGetTo #WeAlsoNeedToSortOutCotsAndCarSeatsAndHighchairsAndThingsSoThatIsMoreFunToLookAt #IJustWantToSwimInTheSeaAndHaveAChangeOfScenery #IDidNotBotherGoingToMyParentsHouseTheOtherDayAsICouldNotBeBotheredToPackUpAllOfBsThings #ByTheTimeIHadFinishingVentingInMyPostAndBlogIFeltMuchBetter #MyMumSaysSheIsSurprisedThatWeAllHaveNotArguedALotMoreThanWeHave #ItIsNiceSeeingMyNanEveryDayAndIFeelGuiltyThatWeAreGoingAwayButItWillBeGoodForUsAll #IJustHopeThatWeWillNotHaveToCancelOurTripAfterAllOfThisPlanningButLetsSee

© Jocelyn Allen - Image from the Oh Me, Oh Mãe photography project
i

Failing To Imitate B Playing With Her Socks While B Tried To Make It Look Like She Took The Photo (26th May 2021)   #WeKeepALotOfHerSocksInTheLivingRoomByHerJacketsSoThatWeCanPutThemOnBeforeGoingOut #BHasANewishThingOfGettingThemAndJustPlayingWithThem #SheMainlyWavesThemAroundButSometimesSheTriesToEatThem #SomeGoodNewsIsThatIPassedMyDrivingTheoryTestThisWeek #MyMumWatchedBWhileIWentIntoBirminghamCityCentre #TheTrainWasBusierThanLastTimeAndSeeingOtherKidsBeingPushedAroundInPushchairsMadeMeMissB #INeedToFindTheCourageToTakeHerThereSometimeButIFeelABitWorried #IHaveNotTakenHerThatFarAwayFromHomeByMyselfBeforeButIShouldTryToDoItSoon #InTwoWeeksTiagoWillHaveAWeekOffSoIAmLookingForwardToThat #MaybeWeWillGoToBirminghamThenSoAtLeastItWillNotBeSoScaryAsTakingHerByMyself #IWasSurprisedThatIPassedMyTestAsThereWereAFewThingsIKnewNothingAbout #NowIJustNeedToFindADrivingInstructorAndGetDrivingWhichIAmExcitedForButAlsoNervousAbout #IQuicklyWentToAGalleryAfterwardsWhichWasMyFirstVisitToOneSinceMovingToBirmingham #IHadToGetBackHomeToTakeBToHerBabyClassSoItWasASuperSpeedyVisit #TheNightBeforeMyTestBWasWakingUpEveryTwoHoursOrSoWhichSheNeverDoes #IThinkSheIsTeethingAndSheIsNotVeryWell #TheOtherMorningSheFellAsleepOnMyNanLessThanAnHourAfterSheHadWokenUpWhichSheRarelyDoes #IAmFineAfterHavingAToothRemovedButNowTiagoHasAToothThatIsPlayingUp #HeManagedToGetToTheDentistYesterdayAndTheyGaveHimSomePenicillin #IfWeManageToMakeItToPortugalThisSummerThenTiagosDentistCousinWillSortHimOut #WeManagedToGetToBsClassOnTimeAndAfterwardsIThoughtSheWouldNotNapOnTheWayHome #IHadPutHerHoodUpAndAfter5MinutesICheckedOnHerAndItWasAllTheWayDownToHerMouthAndSheWasAsleep #SheWasSleepingVeryHeavilyWhileIPushedHerAroundThenJustSatOnABench #MyLegsWereLikeJellyAsIWasNotUsedToWalkingSoMuchInOneDay #LastNightIWasLyingDownOnTheFloorAndBCameOver #IThoughtWeWereGoingToHaveASweetMomentButSheStuckHerThumbUpMyNose #ItWasFunnyButItDidHurtAndMyNoseBledABit #NextWeekIsHalfTermWhichMeansHerClassesAndGroupsWillNotBeRunning #TheWeatherIsGettingBetterAtLeastSoHopefullyWeCanJustSitInTheParkMore #IAmYetToTryGoingToSoftPlayAgainButIShouldGiveTheOneWeHaveNotGoneToAChance  

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