Turn

A journey of Andrea—my exploration of new identity towards a fraction of memories from the past, trapped within fear and insecurity. To find the meaning of love and relationships within.

Since childhood, I have never known how it feels to be appreciated. Living under the threat of domestic violence, I always had to find a way to stay safe and to make myself secure. People said that I still had to be thankful, that I was born into privilege. But why did it create this massive void inside my soul?

The memories of the past haunt me all the time. I had to repress my true self at home. Otherwise, it might cost my sanity, or more. But after dealing with it for the last three decades, I had enough. Now. I just want to run into the field.

Screaming…. Releasing all of those emotions and the voices inside my head.

I wanted to die and wake up again strong, carrying with power and confidence. I realized that I was a stranger to myself. The little boy had been longing to be seen.

As Andrea, I used a self-portraits and staged photography to reconstruct my memory, I seek to overcome the trauma which has become my enemy.

This series, “Turn” is a journey to embrace the process of change, through exploring the fractions of the past, and eventually lead to the liberation of myself. It speaks about my desire to break free, to face my fear, my pain, and seek peace within.