2017 - 2021
« I have the suspicion that to be truly free, it is necessary to see your father die and kill your mother. Or was it the other way around? A section of my mind remains in the dark. My hands sweat, my heartbeat accelerates, a chill runs through my body. I feel the anguish, the temptation and the desire of those who have to commit a crime. Or has it already happened? I can’t take my eyes off. Everything is affectively confusing, amorphous, strange (...) Am I haunted? Or am I the witch? My feet are burning».
It all starts with a mental image: an orange that bleeds. Tainted with the aesthetics of the Japanese counterculture and the Aztec rituals of human sacrifice as a form of poetics, and where cannibalism is presented as a sign to demonstrate contempt for exasperation, I mix performance, space intervention, videos, installations, practices psychological manipulation, science fiction, eroguru, and witchcraft. Blood Orange is made after years of a nomadic life by different countries that have allowed me to build a narrative based on my lucid nightmares, and the practice of free association trying to investigate my discomfort in the culture for various contemporary conflicts based on individual terror and the hypothesis of the possession of a psychological disorder that I have called “paranoid sleep psychosis” based on experiments and research in neuroscience, neurophysiology and art history.
I think there are ways to show that hereditary traumas through genetic loading can be glimpsed in dreams and symptoms or apparently unexplained diseases of the body as a way of reading a person’s physical future and behavior in certain cultures, I even consider that it is applicable to entire generations; According to my theory, all the decisions we make in the past, and even people of our same genetic line, have a blood weight that leads us inexorably towards the future.
Blood Orange is a contemporary portrait of the chaos that appeals to sublimate the emotional death that I decided to give to my whole family in order to heal from the hatred, anger and sadness I felt for the macho orthodoxy in which I was educated. I relate a necessary exile, which has filled me with obsessions related to the encounter and the search for my demons. I don’t know why I was chosen, and I’m generally too busy to ask myself. I have simply assumed them. I am very ambitious, I have many dreams, distressing dreams, from which I need to free myself.
Until I meet any of my goals I have no peace. I have already been able to throw everything away: honor, pride, love, security, happiness, everything, as long as I collaborate to build part of my work and myself. The heart of this work contains a ritual language that is convulsively expressed around change, evil and the cursed, mental illness, loneliness, freedom and destiny.
Faced with the feeling of being uprooted and the need to connect with the deepest origins of humanity, I draw a narrative using the force of instinct and emotional survival in the framework of a world whose laws of life are equally shaded by love and the violence. A world where the felt and the lived sometimes merge in a magical or tragic way. This universe is an affront to terror and dehumanization because, according to my beliefs, passion is itself an act of defiance.