GWO FANM | Awarded Project - PHmuseum

GWO FANM

  • Portrait of my aunt after church

  • Found image of my mother

  • A found photo of my mother.

  • My grandmother preparing to have her picture taken for her passport photo.

  • After my mother passed away, my father placed this portrait of her in our dining room—he said he wanted to make sure we remembered her.

  • Portrait of my godmother after church. She is standing next to a photo of her younger self.

  • Portrait of my grandmother preparing to take her passport photos. When people think about immigrating to the US, they always frame it as taking a step up to democracy, to a better life with more opportunities. When I think about immigrating to the US, I think about the long and arduous process my grandmother had to go through once she came to this country, about how she died before she was able to sponsor the rest of her family to come to the US.

  • Image of my abandoned family home I have collaged the faces of my family members

  • Portrait of Bianca taken before finding my mother's album.

  • Found image of my mother when she was young.

  • Manipulated image of my uncle Raphael and his wife.

  • Found image of my aunt—on the back is a hand written breakup letter: “Life is a flower and a blow. Very often right next to joy, pleasure, and laughter, there is always tears and sorrow that brings ugliness and darkness to our existence. Because life is made of separation, I must bend myself to the laws of nature."

  • Grieve/Rejoice

{"id":34666,"grant_id":15,"user_id":52931,"grant_submission_status_id":4,"grant_result_type_id":null,"cover_block_id":378123,"story_id":30020,"place_id":null,"title":"GWO FANM","excerpt":"","excerpt_raw":"","body":"<p>A huge part of my identity and the relationships to those around me stems from familial interactions. Things happen to us, we happen to people, and through these interactions stories are made. \r<\/p><p>Over the course of my life, I\u2019ve had the desire to know who my mother was before my time. Two years ago, I found her only surviving photo album and inside were water-stained pages of photos that friends and family in Haiti had sent her. Through the colors and smells, memories came flooding back to me and something clicked; I felt reconnected and it launched me on what had felt like my life\u2019s mission to reconnecting with my familial history. Finding the album prompted many conversations about my history. Not having any records of my mother in her youth along with the absence of her presence after her passing, there has been a need to fill this sort of emptiness.\r<\/p><p>My work explores knowledge through the realm of spirituality and the physical, speaking to the ways that family, social status and trauma may be carried in the body. Much of my work occurs through active listening, observation and recollection. I began making images of the women who were connected to me through my mother\u2019s life and in a way, it became a search for my mother through them. While sharing memories of her, they also shared some of their own stories of their migration to the United States. \r<\/p><p>For my current project, I want to self-publish a photo book in honor of my late mother. I\u2019m naming this book \u201cGwo Fanm\u201d, inspired by a conversation with my aunt after finding out the man who raped me was arrested. She expressed her anger towards him and praised God for doing what he does best. She then told me, in kreyol, that I was a gwo fanm and that nothing can stand in my way. Gwo fanm translates to Big Woman in English. Big Woman as in \u201cto take up space\u201d. I immediately thought of my mom. The resilience she embodied while taking space as an immigrant black woman and of the many generations of black women that have come before her. \r<\/p><p> \tReferencing the images from my mother\u2019s album and thinking about how the people in these images are dressed and the interior spaces that serve as backdrops compared to my own work made prior, I\u2019ve come to the surprising conclusion that there are many parallels between my mother\u2019s family photos and my work. These similarities highlight a spiritual connection to my familial history and my present self, which has led me to see meaning in not only connecting my past to my present but hoping that this project can resonate with others with similar family dynamics, leading them to re\/discover the gaps within their family history as well. \r<\/p><p>Oftentimes, immigration breaks cracks into our minds and I\u2019m really proud of creating a work that can extend healing to so many people in that way. This book will illustrate resistance and intergenerational trauma and how we carry them through our bodies. The pairing of found images, writings from relatives and my personal work will give birth to reflection, homage and generational resistance against erasure.<\/p>","body_raw":"A huge part of my identity and the relationships to those around me stems from familial interactions. Things happen to us, we happen to people, and through these interactions stories are made. \r\n\r\nOver the course of my life, I\u2019ve had the desire to know who my mother was before my time. Two years ago, I found her only surviving photo album and inside were water-stained pages of photos that friends and family in Haiti had sent her. Through the colors and smells, memories came flooding back to me and something clicked; I felt reconnected and it launched me on what had felt like my life\u2019s mission to reconnecting with my familial history. Finding the album prompted many conversations about my history. Not having any records of my mother in her youth along with the absence of her presence after her passing, there has been a need to fill this sort of emptiness.\r\nMy work explores knowledge through the realm of spirituality and the physical, speaking to the ways that family, social status and trauma may be carried in the body. Much of my work occurs through active listening, observation and recollection. I began making images of the women who were connected to me through my mother\u2019s life and in a way, it became a search for my mother through them. While sharing memories of her, they also shared some of their own stories of their migration to the United States. \r\nFor my current project, I want to self-publish a photo book in honor of my late mother. I\u2019m naming this book \u201cGwo Fanm\u201d, inspired by a conversation with my aunt after finding out the man who raped me was arrested. She expressed her anger towards him and praised God for doing what he does best. She then told me, in kreyol, that I was a gwo fanm and that nothing can stand in my way. Gwo fanm translates to Big Woman in English. Big Woman as in \u201cto take up space\u201d. I immediately thought of my mom. The resilience she embodied while taking space as an immigrant black woman and of the many generations of black women that have come before her. \r\n \tReferencing the images from my mother\u2019s album and thinking about how the people in these images are dressed and the interior spaces that serve as backdrops compared to my own work made prior, I\u2019ve come to the surprising conclusion that there are many parallels between my mother\u2019s family photos and my work. These similarities highlight a spiritual connection to my familial history and my present self, which has led me to see meaning in not only connecting my past to my present but hoping that this project can resonate with others with similar family dynamics, leading them to re\/discover the gaps within their family history as well. \r\nOftentimes, immigration breaks cracks into our minds and I\u2019m really proud of creating a work that can extend healing to so many people in that way. This book will illustrate resistance and intergenerational trauma and how we carry them through our bodies. The pairing of found images, writings from relatives and my personal work will give birth to reflection, homage and generational resistance against 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image of my aunt\u2014on the back is a hand written breakup letter: \u201cLife is a flower and a blow. 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