I grew up in an environment where no one expressed emotions or opened up about anything. My family didn't do it, my friends didn't do it and therefore I didn't do it. I never developed a language for expressing my emotions. I never knew that I needed it.
Although I always felt affection in my upbringing, I never felt an intimate connection to the people around me. In my search for this language, I was looking for a person who was suitable for imitation. But I couldn't find this person. In my adult life, I find myself trying to connect to people in a different way, a way that allows me to feel close to others.
In this project, I explore the rift between the relation to my past and present self. By merging myself and my family's past and present, I try to express how I have felt. In the effort of finding a language for this, I hope to be able to express the things that weren't possible back then.
I hope that my family will understand that I am trying to speak to and for them - in an attempt to move onwards.