Burning Lilies

This project is an exploration of our (me and my husband) choice to not have children. As we started to tell people about our decision, they didn’t really know how to react it seemed. Most couldn’t imagine we would make such a decision at our age (27 and 29). Joost got a vasectomy so it’s pretty permanent. And people kept saying ‘oh, just wait, those hormones will kick in’. And that is something I can’t imagine… It seemed this subject should be further examined.

Maybe it was naive of me to think a life choice like this would be more accepted in this day and age. The ideal family image of two parents and at least two children (preferably a girl and a boy) is rooted very deeply into the western culture. And I think a lot of the strange and somewhat hurtful reactions we got come from that. After talking to other women and couples about the subject it became clear that many are struggling with the pressure of society to have children. It is hard to stay true to yourself, but imagine, wouldn't it be awful to have a parent that didn't want you?