Trauma - PhMuseum

Trauma

Margarita Khatmullina

2018

It was the month of February 2018. I ran across the road, under slipped and fell. As a result, I broke my right arm. In the hospital, the hand was plastered. I hoped that in a couple of weeks I would take it off, and return to my business, my work, my old life. But the fracture of the arm turned out to be difficult, after a month I was offered to do two operations, put the Ilizarov apparatus on my arm, then implant a titanium plate.

For two months I practically did not leave the house, remaining alone. The body ceased to seem to me as a whole. The hand felt like something separate from me. The inability to control what was happening caused a sense of anxiety. I put the camera on a tripod chin, left hand and right knee. I photographed myself on the phone, on the camera, trying to express through the images that arose inside of me, internal mental states. For discover the fears in which I was afraid to admit to myself, and thereby try to stay in the role of an outside observer.

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